


Save Your Love for Someone Like Me

by glitterbee



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: F/F, crystal is gay and sad, im going feral i swear, this is based off the allie x and mitski song, this is just yearning im sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-18
Updated: 2020-08-18
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:27:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25979701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glitterbee/pseuds/glitterbee
Summary: Gigi took a shuddering breath before she spoke, “Crys...c-can you pick me up? I’m way...way too drunk to drive and I have no money for an Uber...”It was almost crazy for Gigi to even ask the question. Crystal would always say yes to her, no matter what. It was scary, the amount of power the blonde held over her. With a simple look and a single word, Crystal would jump off the edge of the world for Gigi. She would throw her whole life away just for the slim chance to provide Gigi with a semblance of happiness.Sometimes Crystal would think to herself, please just leave me, please just let me go because you overwhelm me so much I don’t know how to breathe anymore. You suffocate me and if you ever told me you loved me too I think I would die. But then Gigi would laugh at one of her dumb jokes or their hands would briskly touch, and then she would remember.You make me feel alive.
Relationships: Gigi Goode/Crystal Methyd
Comments: 12
Kudos: 36





	Save Your Love for Someone Like Me

Crystal was already in bed when she received the call. 

It was three in the morning but she was not asleep yet, instead electing to lay in bed scrolling through Twitter aimlessly. There was nothing that interesting on her timeline but Crystal didn’t feel like going to sleep quite yet. 

She was about to go search for conspiracy videos on Youtube to keep her entertained when her phone suddenly burst to life, playing the beginning chords of the Glee version of the thong song, Gigi’s name lighting up her screen. She giggled to herself as the song played. She had set it as her friend’s ringtone as a joke after Gigi had told her how much she despised the song. 

Gigi had been Crystal’s best friend for ten years, and Crystal had been in love with her for eight of those years. They had met in school and had been attached to the hip ever since. They told each other everything and there was no one in the world Crystal trusted more than Gigi. 

“Crys?” Her best friend’s voice was slightly distorted by the phone but was still immediately recognisable to Crystal. Her friend said her name like it was a plea. 

Crystal sat up and stretched her arms, “Gigi? What’s up?”

She could hear the sound of thundering music and indecipherable voices shouting and laughing on the other side of the line. It suddenly occurred to Crystal that Gigi had gone out again like she tended to do most nights. Sometimes Crystal would join her however that didn’t happen often. As much fun as it was to go get drunk with her best friend, having to stand by and watch her dance with her boyfriend as she watched from the sidelines was too much to bear. It was easier to stay at home and wait till the night went to shit, Gigi phoning Crystal in tears and then Crystal coming to pick her up. 

Gigi took a shuddering breath before she spoke, “Crys...c-can you pick me up? I’m way...way too drunk to drive and I have no money for an Uber...”

It was almost crazy for Gigi to even ask the question. Crystal would always say yes to her, no matter what. It was scary, the amount of power the blonde held over her. With a simple look and a single word, Crystal would jump off the edge of the world for Gigi. She would throw her whole life away just for the slim chance to provide Gigi with a semblance of happiness. 

Sometimes Crystal would think to herself,  _ please just leave me, please just let me go because you overwhelm me so much I don’t know how to breathe anymore. You suffocate me and if you ever told me you loved me too I think I would die.  _ But then Gigi would laugh at one of her dumb jokes or their hands would briskly touch, and then she would remember. 

_ You make me feel alive.  _

“Of course I will!” Crystal replied, balancing her phone on her shoulder as she tried to find some clean clothes in the pile she had scattered on her bedroom floor, “Where are you?”

“I’m...uhh...outside that new club downtown...What’s it called?” 

Crystal sighed, her friend was obviously drunk out of her mind and the fact she was alone whilst in this state was worrying to her, “Are you talking about Blue Ocean?”

The redhead could hear Gigi snap her fingers on the other side of her line, “Yes! That’s it! I’m at the Blue Ocean!”

Crystal threw some old jeans on and decided that the shirt she was sleeping in would have to do for now. Normally she liked to make an effort for Gigi and dress up nice. It wasn’t because her friend would ever judge her for how she dressed, but because she thrived off any compliments Gigi would throw her way. When Gigi told her she looked pretty and hugged her, overwhelming her with the scent of expensive perfume and cigarette smoke, Crystal’s whole world would stop. She would lay awake at night, agonizingly overthinking every interaction and touch. Her fingers would burn from the way they bumped into Gigi’s. They burned out of a desire to hold her hand and never let go. 

However, Crystal didn’t have time to search for nice clothes and make herself look presentable. The idea of Gigi alone and drunk, standing outside a packed club in the cold winter night made Crystal sick to her stomach. She knew the nausea wouldn’t go away till she had Gigi safe and sound in her car, so she grabbed her keys and ran out of the door.

“Okay, the Blue Ocean isn’t that far away. I’ll be there as soon as I can. I’m in my car right now.” Crystal said on the phone, trying to reassure her friend. 

“Please...please don’t hang up Crys...I don’t want to be alone right now…” The blonde sniffed. 

“You want me to be on my phone and drive? You know that’s illegal right?”

_ “Please,”  _ Gigi begged, her voice choking on the last syllable of the word. 

Crystal bit down on her bottom lip and with a sigh put her phone on speaker and placed it on the passenger’s seat. She put her key in the ignition and began to start her old beaten up car, “Okay...I’m still here...Just keep talking to me so I know you are safe.”

The drunk girl began to babble on as Crystal drove down the streets, a monochrome patchwork of brick and stone. She could barely understand what Gigi was saying in her drunken stupor, instead finding comfort in the way her voice melted in her ears like honey. It didn’t matter what the girl was saying, her voice was like a song that she would never tire of. 

Crystal made it into the downtown area in record time, whilst only breaking a  _ few  _ traffic laws, which was a new personal best for her. The streets were lit up brightly with neon signs, illuminating the colourful graffiti scattered along the walls. She found herself distracted for a split second, watching the various people that were littered on the street despite it being three in the morning. She was quickly brought back to reality, however when she suddenly heard a guttural sob echo out from her phone.

“A-and then Marshall...he...he…” Gigi was unable to finish her sentence as she burst into tears. 

_ Of course, Marshall is the cause of all of this,  _ Crystal thought to herself. Marshall was Gigi’s boyfriend and Crystal hated his guts. Him and Gigi had been together for almost two years and for the majority of that time he had treated her like shit. Crystal knew she was biased, but anyone who made Gigi cry like he did, deserved none of her kindness or respect. No matter how many times she told her friend she deserved someone better, Gigi would always go back to him.

It hurt Crystal more than she would care to admit. 

"What did he do now?" Crystal questioned, her hands gripping tightly on the steering wheel. Honestly, she didn't care what he had done, he had made Gigi cry yet again and that was enough to make her angry.

"T-the same shit as usual," Gigi sobbed on the other side of the line, hiccuping due to a mixture of her tears and the alcohol coursing through her veins, "What's new?"

"Okay...Just stay right there okay?" Crystal said, trying to calm down her crying best friend, "I'm coming now...just hold on...I'm only a block away now."

“I’m sorry,” Gigi whispered, causing Crystal’s heart to sink.

“You don’t need to apologise to me, okay?” She replied, almost on instinct, as her eyes stared laser-focused on the road ahead. 

_ You never need to apologise to me. You could kick me down and spit on my face and I would still look at you like the sun shined out of your smile. You never owe me anything because I would take a bullet for you. I would never ask anything of you, I wouldn’t even ask you to love me back, because I would die for your love, I always would have.  _

“I-I know it’s late and it’s selfish of me to always call you,” Even though Crystal cannot see Gigi she already knows that the girl is trembling, biting down on her bottom lip hard enough to draw blood, “I just don’t have anyone else that I-”

_ There’s no one else I would allow to see me fall apart. _

“It’s just...you’re my closest friend,” Is what Gigi elects to say instead. 

Gigi doesn’t need to say anything because, after years of friendship, Crystal already knows what Gigi truly means, “It’s okay. I understand.”

By the time Crystal pulls up outside the club, Gigi is sat on the curb, phone pressed up to her ear, and her knees up to her chest. She is wearing a short, skin-tight black dress with matching heels. Crystal can see the goosebumps on her bare legs thanks to the cold winter wind. Gigi’s blonde hair was let down, sweat causing some of the golden locks to stick down her face. She must have gone to the club in a full face of makeup since her mascara is running down her cheeks in blotches and her red lipstick is smudged against her lips. 

When she notices Crystal, a small smile breaks out on her face and she stands up on wobbly legs, trying to maintain her balance. She puts her phone in her purse and stumbles into the car, placing herself in the passenger’s seat. 

“You actually came.” She said, almost like she believed there was any universe where Crystal wouldn’t drop everything for Gigi.

“Of course I did,” The redhead replied, “Now let’s get out of here.”

“Wait,” Gigi said, her eyes darting to peer at the entrance of the club, “I...I didn’t tell Marshall where I went...He might get worried.”

Crystal winced at the mention of the girl’s boyfriend, “If he noticed that you were gone, wouldn’t he have come searched for you by now?” 

Gigi faltered and her bottom lip trembled as she stared with wide eyes at the club, “It-It was busy in there...There were a lot of people and-and he could have gotten distracted…”

“Gigi,” Crystal interrupted sternly, “I can’t just loiter in the middle of the street.”

“Can we just...drive up and down the street? He might come out soon.  _ Please.”  _ The blonde pleaded desperately. 

“I can’t...You need to get home Geege.”

The blonde furrowed her eyebrows and pouted. She huffed and crossed her arms, turning her body away from Crystal, “You’re no fun.”

Crystal felt Gigi’s words pierce her heart like a dagger but chose to ignore the pain she felt in her chest, “It’s almost half three in the morning and you are drunk. You need to sleep.”

“I don’t want to sleep,” Gigi mumbled, almost acting like a child. Crystal simply rolled her eyes. 

“Then what do you want?” She asked. 

Her best friend paused and thought for a moment before turning back to Crystal, “I...I think I just want to drive around for a bit...Enjoy the night.”

Crystal nodded and began to drive away from the club. The two drove in silence and Crystal put on her radio to add some background noise. The radio crackled and filled the small car with the soft melodies of jazz music. Gigi opened the car window and smiled at Crystal. 

The cool chill of the January air made Crystal shiver, but she didn’t have the heart to tell Gigi to pull up her window. She relished in the way Gigi would stick her head out of the window, a tired smile on her face as the roaring winds twirled in her long blonde hair and whistled in her ears. 

“He’s not that bad you know?” Gigi finally piped up in a small voice, looking at Crystal expectantly. 

Crystal scoffed, “I find that hard to believe.”

“Crys, please,” Gigi pleaded, “He’s not what you think he is.”

Her hands tensed on the steering wheel, “I don’t understand why you defend him so much,  _ especially  _ after he makes you cry like you did tonight.”

_ Why do you let him into your heart so easily? Why do you let him hurt you over and over again? Why can’t you just save your love for someone who deserves it? Someone who would care for you. Someone who would love you with no restraint, no complaints. Someone who would bend over backwards for you. Someone who loves you so much it physically hurts. Someone who would take all your pain and suffering and bear it themselves so you would never have to feel sadness again.  _

_ Someone like me.  _

Gigi sighed and rested her head against the car door, “You just don’t understand…”

“Understand what?”

The blonde turned back at her, staring at her intently with her dark brown eyes, “Crystal, have you ever been in love?”

_ Yes. _

“No,” Crystal whispered, the lie burning in her throat. 

“Exactly,” Gigi said, “When you love someone...it just...it doesn’t make sense! No matter how much they hurt you...you go back because being hurt is better than living without them...You can’t imagine your world without them...Of course, you wouldn’t understand Crys...you’ve never been in love…”

_ I understand more than you would ever realise.  _

“Do you really love him?” The redhead asked, already afraid of the answer. 

“Yes,” Gigi replied without a second of doubt. It made Crystal want to throw up. She wanted to tell Gigi everything without confessing a thing. 

They sat in silence once again for the rest of the car journey. Eventually, they made their way to Gigi’s house at 4 am, Crystal parking in her drive. 

Gigi smiled softly at Crystal, “Thanks again for the ride...I know I can always rely on you.”

"It's no problem," Crystal said in a quiet voice.

"No, seriously Crys," Gigi continued, "You are my favourite person."

Her words made Crystal’s heart flip, despite the fact she knew it wasn’t true. 

“I love you,” Crystal choked out, the words slipping out before she could process what she was saying. 

Gigi stared at her for a second, her eyes wide, almost like she was processing the words Crystal had just thrown at her. Eventually, she shook her head and giggled, pulling Crystal into a tight hug causing Crystal’s heart to swell.

“I love you too Crys.” She replied, poking her nose with her perfectly manicured finger. She had obviously misread Crystal’s confession as just a friendly gesture. 

_ If you love me, then you love me in a way I do not understand.  _

Before Crystal could process the whirlwind of emotions whirling in her stomach, Gigi opened the door and hopped out the car. She gave Crystal a quick wave and walked into her house, yelling a goodbye before shutting the door. 

Crystal reversed out of her drive and drove about five minutes down the street before she pulled over and rested her head against the steering wheel. A steady stream of tears began to flow down her cheeks as she pounded her fists against the steering wheel weakly. She eventually let out a heart-wrenching wail, her whole body shaking and trembling terribly. She felt weak and hollow, but it didn’t matter anymore. 

_ Why aren’t I enough for you? Why can’t you love me like I love you? Let me show you what real love is, let me set free the tornados you have created inside me. Let me show you the way everything I do, I do for you.  _

After sobbing for half an hour, Crystal eventually began to make her way home. She took a deep breath and mentally began building up her walls once again, the walls that Gigi always managed to knock down and destroy with only a few simple words. 

After all, she knew she would be picking Gigi up once again this time next week, just like always. 

**Author's Note:**

> "crystal is a fat simp" - em cherry emoji (2020)
> 
> OKAY I KNOW I HAVE TO WORK ON LETS FALL IN LOVE (AGAIN) BUT I GOT INSPO FOR THIS FIC AND I HAD TO WRITE IT BEFORE I WENT FERAL!!!
> 
> this fic goes out to my twinnie gian <33333 we have spent the whole day crying over 'susie save your love' and we r not doing okay like this is a genuine cry for help im not joking. i wrote this as a special gift for her bcs i put her through enough emotional trauma by introducing her to the song
> 
> THIS WAS P TOUGH TO WRITE THO BUT ALSO FUN SO PLS COMMENT IF U ENJOYED!!!!!!! its fun to do short lil oneshots again tbh!!!! if its popular i might try and make a continuation one day maybe


End file.
